JAMESCLEAR

RESTART BUTTON // I shared in THE ASCENT Part 3 of recent struggles in my Ascent to improve my health with the ultimate goal of reaching the age of 100 years old. I thought that month was just a hiccup and I would soon be back on the path to improving my health…I was wrong. At that time, I was up 5 lbs from the pervious month, 1 1/2 lbs more than when I started on my 40th birthday in July. This morning I weighed 219.5 lbs, 9 1/2 lbs more than last month and 10 lbs higher than my original weight 3 months ago. I realize that weight isn’t everything, but I also feel crappier. It’s been hard to wake up in the morning, I’ve had 4 migraines in the past week, my body just feels tired all the time. I feel stressed, anxious. What do I do about it? I keep shoving any food I can get to into my face and say I’ll start again tomorrow. That’s been really pretty much the sum of my adult life. I’ll gain weight, lose it for a while, gain weight, lose it for a while and never consistently keep it off.

Something needs to change. What is it?

I can’t keep doing this same thing and expect a different outcome. They say that’s the definition of insanity, right?! I’ve tried the workouts (P90X, NLXF, Crossfit, T25), worked out at gyms (LA Fitness, Planet Fitness, YMCA), tried having 1 cheat day a week, Noom, eating 1/2 of my french fries (my brother still makes fun of me for that). They all worked (except maybe the french fries), but they never stayed. So, what was wrong with them? There was one common denominator: Me.

ENVIRONMENTAL CHANGE // According to his blog on improving health and productivity, James Clear, author of Atomic Habits shares, “Making changes can be difficult. It’s hard to get motivated to do something over and over again – even when we know that it’s good for you.” Later on in the article he says, “You may think that you control most of your choices, but the truth is that a large portion of your actions every day are simply a response to the environment design around you.” He goes on to give some great tips of simple ways you can change the environment around you to get more of the outcomes that you want. If you want to floss more, make floss easier to get to. If you want to eat more fruit and less cookies – hide the cookies and put the fruit on the counter.

Where do I start? Do I go through all of my kitchen cupboards and throw away everything that isn’t going to get me where I want to go? Do I wake up at 5 AM every day and workout? Do I just eat clean foods that will better fuel my body? Yes.

Is that a simple enough answer? Listen, we all know what we need to do to become healthy, but we just usually choose the other option, right? I mean, c’mon! What is it going to take to change from knowing what we should do to transition to doing what we should do? I don’t know that answer yet, but you’re welcome to come along on this journey with me as I’m looking for a sustainable healthy lifestyle.

WHAT I’M TRYING // I’m going to try exactly what I said above. I’m going to start going to bed at 9:00 PM and getting up at 5:00 AM each morning. I still don’t know exactly what I’m going to do at that time, but I want to start the habit of showing up and I’ll figure it out as I go. I also plan on getting rid of those foods that don’t help me. Doesn’t mean I will never get to eat them, but I want them out of the house, and I want it to take an extra effort to eat the things that I don’t need. I also want to be picky about it – when I’m going to eat something that I won’t get very often, it’s gotta be the best! I’m talking Cheesecake Factory, not instant cheesecake. Lastly, I’m going to pretend I’m a healthy person and put food into my body like that healthy person I always imagined I would be. Maybe I can fake it until I make it!

GETTING STARTED // If you’re crazy enough, you’re welcome to join me in anything I’m trying here. Anytime you’re trying something that could effect your health, it’s good to run it by your Dr. If you aren’t interested in what I’m going to do, what is a habit you would like to start or stop? What is one thing you can do tomorrow to make it easier to start? Or what is one thing you can do to make it easier to quit?

TO MY BOYS // “You are one of the main reasons I’m doing this. I want to be there for you for a long time, and I realize that right now I’m only getting in my way. I’m so proud of you. I’m thankful every day that I get to be your dad! You are the very best parts of me. You are dearly loved by your mom and me. Now go out there and do your best.” – Dad

YOU ARE WHAT YOUR SURROUND YOURSELF WITH // Motivational speaker Jim Rohn once said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” I don’t know if I fully believe that, but I do know that the environments we are exposed to shape who we are. We were born into some of those environments and had zero control over them, while others we can have a lot of control of.

I know that when I hang out with certain people, I get really excited hearing about their projects, business dreams, or recent vacations. That motivates me to be a more productive and driven man! At least for a few days…until the feeling wears off.

There is also what I will call the Culver’s dilemma. When I go out to eat and have the best intentions of ordering something healthier, or at least smaller potions, then hear my wife order a double cheeseburger basket with cheese curds, my good intentions get thrown out the drive-up window right away and I’m getting the same, but with fries and a small chocolate Reese’s peanut butter cup concrete mixer with peanut butter sauce. What’s wrong with me?!

PROVERB // In the Bible, Proverbs 13:20 says, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” If we just put ourselves in the radius of wise people we become wise, like it will just rub off on us! But it also warns that if we hang out with fools we’re going to suffer. Not that we will become a fool, but that we will suffer harm. The biggest takeaway here is that both have a major impact on outcome. One outcome being Wisdom while the other outcome is Harm. When you look back at some of your childhood stories and some of the dumbest things you did in your life – how many of them involved an idea from someone else? Or trying to do what someone else was doing?

When I was in middle school we had a Home Economics class where we had to learn how to use a sewing machine. One day we were given the task of following a dot-to-dot with a threadless needle to work on our sewing accuracy and agility. This exercise didn’t take long, leaving idle hands for some foolish company. One kid, we’ll call him Tim, was sitting at his machine and there were a few of us around him. I stupidly dared another kid to stick his finger under the needle. He declined. I said, “Duh, watch.” No sooner had I put the tip of my finger directly under that needle when Tim’s foot tapped the pedal. I still have a scar on the tip of my left pointer finger as a reminder of how stupid that was.

DEFYING GRAVITY // Now think back to those moments that you would say you were at your best. What was different? You were motived. You had a goal. You probably had a friend, or team, or coach, or mentor, or parent, or spouse at your side all along the way. If you want to defy gravity, defying the world around you, it takes clear dreams, but it also takes a great support system around you.

DON’T BE A FOOL // In James Clear’s book Atomic Habits he has a quote that will forever be engraved in my mind: “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.” I would take that a step further and say the people you choose to welcome into your life are a step towards the person you will become.

Dear Sons,

Don’t be a fool! Don’t surround yourself with people that are making choices that you don’t want for your life. Don’t hang out with people that don’t speak truth and life into you. If someone sucks the life out of you – respectfully decline their company. I’m not saying this because I’m afraid you’ll embarrass me. I love you always and no matter what. If I have to, I will be that father pacing back and forth for the prodigal son. I’m saying this because I don’t want you to waste your life.

GETTING STARTED // Write down the top 5-10 people in your life. Not in theory, but who are the people you invest the most time with? Write down their names on a piece of paper. Are those people what you want to become like? Are they encouraging and helping you grow to be a better person or are they sucking the life out of you? Sometimes there is a very difficult reality that you might need some new friends.

TO MY BOYS // “I’m so proud of you. I’m thankful every day that I get to be your dad! You are the very best parts of me. You are dearly loved by your mom and me. Now go out there and do your best.” – Dad

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THE ASCENT Part 4

HALO OF INFLUENCE